Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Another Motive For Metaphor by Jennifer Knox


By Jennifer L. Knox

I love to masturbate, especially
after a poem of mine's been accepted in
a literary magazine. Shit---
I open up that letter, smile awhile
and think, "This one goes out to Don, a total
tool who I temped for in '89:
Data-mother-fucking-entry this."
Who's got "inappropriate footwear" now?
"The inappropriate footwear's on the other
foot today, you hick," I tell him, tell
them all, as, lifting up my shirt, I notice
nipples! Mine (O, gorgeous areolas!---
pink as Peonies)! And ass (my bouncy
pony, prance in skintight smarty-pants!)!

From: "The Best American Erotic Poems" edited by David Lehman


This poem cracks me up every single time I read it. Any of you who have ever had a temp job or dealt with an asshole boss can appreciate it, I'm sure, whether or not you've ever had a poem accepted by a literary magazine.

Another rainy day here on the first official day of Autumn. Happy Autumn! Wishing you laughter, sunshine, peace, love and blessings----



Kelly said...

Fortunately I always had good bosses when in the work world.

Entertaining post!

Phoenix said...

lol David Lehman is a busy editor (can't believe I have to wait another week to get my Best American Poetry of 2009!)

And this poem is pure awesome.

Marion said...

Kelly, you are a RARE bird, let me tell you! I could write a BOOK on the jerks I've worked for, both male and female. No make that VOLUMES of books! LOL! Blessings!

Phoenix, isn't it a hoot? Let me know how you like your book when it comes in, okay? Blessings!

Wine and Words said...

OH. MY. GOSH. Please, please, please let me get to this place where I have succeeded beyond all..every friggin' one...of my crappy bosses. I am an asshole magnet. Break the cycle already!

Marion said...

Annie, why do so many people who are 'bosses' feel like they have to be mean to those working for them? I've never understood this. Many of my friends say the same thing you do.

One woman I know had a boss who went through her desk and calender every day and her computer---the boss would goof off all day then give her hours worth of dictation that had to go out that day right at closing time---consistently; another had an office manager whose work SHE did, but the office manager took all the credit, then berated the woman to the boss. I could go on and on. Even one of my own daughters works with an old bitch teacher who's made her mad enough to cry. My daughter is like me, very tender-hearted and the bitch just bullies her all the time. I do believe in karma and 'do unto others' I only hope all of these people get what's due them!! Good luck to you, dear friend!! Love & Blessings!!

Karen said...

I am laughing my butt off at this one!

Marion said...

Pretty funny, huh Karen! :-) Blessings!

Woman in a Window said...

Marion, OHMYGOD, now this, THIS is my kinda poetry!

Ha! Marion, you find all the best ones.

Marion said...

Erin, ain't it a hoot? I've read it about 5 times today and still keep laughing. She sounds like a person I'd love to know. I just have a HUGE poetry collection and am lucky enough to have time to persue my books for the good stuff. Glad you enjoyed it. Love & Blessings, my poet-friend!

Anonymous said...

I never have to buy another Poetry book as long as I come in here and read you! I am loving this, you. Priceless.

BTW Tomorrow I will prove to you I am NOT. Really! Watch my place,I have written something for you. Yes you!

Marion said...

Okay, Saraha. I can't wait!!!! September is becoming my favorite month this year! Blessings and Love!

Rikkij said...

Marion-Damn I love attitude and she's got a tank full! And ain't you just the one to find it! pony ass. I love it! ~rick

Rikkij said...

Marion-why won't it say my comment went through? especially since it was about masturbation and attitude. Shit! I'm starting to hate blogger! I'll check back later if I remember. Only you would bring this to us and how we love you for it! ~rick

Marion said...

I'm getting a kick out of blogger messing with you because I always get 2 comments! Ha! Just kidding. Sorry you're being harassed by my blog. Truly, it's not me doing it! LOL! Love to you, too, friend of my heart...