By Linda Pastan, from "Waiting For My Life"
than lover or husband
it cleaves to you,
calling itself by your name
as if there had been a ceremony.
At night, you turn and turn
searching for the one
but though you may finally sleep
it wakens ahead of you.
How heavy it is,
displacing with its volume
your very breath.
Before, you seemed to weigh nothing,
your arms might have been wings.
Now each finger adds its measure;
you are pulled down by the weight
of your own hair.
And if your life should disappear ahead of you
you would not run after it.
Pain is with me 24/7, 365. Nobody can see it, so few believe it. It feels like I should be bleeding profusely, covered in bruises...but I'm not. Autoimmune disorders, say the doctors...no known cause, no cure...just pain that affects mostly women...go figure. To those in pain...I wish you relief. xo